No book today.

Just got a new computer and all my thingies are saved on there. I'll be formatting and setting up automatic updates this weekend, though, so that shan't be a problem. If you need some new entertainment, why not click on these three words and visit my new project, wherein I watch all the Disney movies in order, one a week, for a year?

31 - The Mystery of the Singing Ghost

While I'm sure there's some in-story reason for them to be sitting there, I like to imagine they were just hanging out on the steps of an abandoned house (abandoned, presumably, because some genius architect decided to have the front steps lead up to a window instead of the door,) when a Ghost walked up and started Singing. And then they all got their surprised faces out. Actually, Violet's looks particularly artificial. Bet she set the whole thing up with a friend. It's probably just Nancy. As for the clothing, there's something really familiar about it, but I can't put my finger - Wait...

MIND. BLOWN.

30 - The Disappearing Friend Mystery

No, it's the Hospital Fund-Raiser Vandalism mystery. Stop lying to me, cover. I'm still getting over Nancy and her T-shirt. Speaking of which, it looks like the vandals assaulted Jessie's shirt, too. I can't get into this one. Just paint new signs, guys. You obviously didn't take long the first time. And then go look for your Disappearing Friend. Hey, maybe it's Nancy. Or "Mike".

29 - The Mystery Cruise

I'm not certain this even is a The Mystery Cruise. I think it's a normal cruise, and they're pretending it's mysterious for... I don't know, tax purposes. Look at how they're smiling. Haven't seen that since book 24. They needed this. Even Jessie's pointing is all relaxed. In other news, HENRY'S SOCKS HENRY'S SOCKS HENRY'S SOCKS.

28 - The Mystery Girl

I try to avoid actually knowing anything about these, but as I was checking Wikipedia early in my writings, the plot synopsis for this one caught my eye. "The Aldens see Nancy steal a T-shirt." Seriously. That's it. A cover promising clues in old photos, a mysterious closet, and a fireplace dashed on the rocks in favor of some shopliftery at the Gap. She's not even a Mystery Girl! She's Nancy! Maybe the Wiki editors make plot summaries like the people who work at Netflix. As far as I can tell, they just take some random unimportant thing from the first five minutes of a TV episode and make that their synopsis. Either that or they talk about it in terms to vague to mean anything. Well, I'm going to watch How I Met Your Mother. In this one, "The gang orders food at the bar, and Barney deceives a woman for sex." Events are sure to transpire!

EDIT: It occurs to me now that she could have stolen the T-shirt from the closet. Which would explain the one empty hanger. Maybe she was just trying to save it from being worn by an Alden.

PS: If anyone was wondering if I ever use this blog to hit on women, the answer is yes: Hello, lady with the cool boots and big eyes that I was helping to find books yesterday. Thanks for visiting my blog. You're super pretty. Here's that book I was telling you about. The story in question is "Utensile Strength", and it's set after Talking to Dragons.

27 - The Camp-Out Mystery.

Girls! Did you learn nothing from the Bobbsey Twins?! I asked for rampaging insanity, not a tight close-up of two scared people in a tent! Well, if there's one thing I love, it's imagining the Boxcar Children overreacting to mundane stimuli, so let's see...

THE TOP TEN THINGS JESSIE AND VIOLET ARE PROBABLY HEARING ON THEIR CAMP-OUT THAT THEY SHOULDN'T ACTUALLY BE SCARED OF

10 - Owl Hooting

9 - Branch rustling

8 - Henry peeing on a tree

7 - Blair witch

6 - Benny peeing in his sleeping bag

5 - The escaped monkey from the last book

4 - The clown from Candy Castle... no wait, they should be scared of that.

3 - Diamond Smugglers

2 - Benny getting his hand stuck in a Hunny Tree

1 - The loud clashing of their entire wardrobe

Now this is more like it.

Man, sometimes I get a little down on the Boxcars. For despite all their pointing and squatting and horrible shoes, I feel like sometimes they just aren't trying that hard. So here's a lesson, kids, from the child sleuths who came before you. Or technically during, as this one was from 1968. Anyway, I can hardly think of a thing to add to this cover. A phallic barber pole spaceship in the middle of some kind of druidic sacrifice circle is releasing a clown from a slide that appears to be the only method of entry, apart from a row of windows too close to cover separate floors. And TWO sets of twins look on! I don't even know which ones are the Bobbsey twins, or if there's more than one set, or what! This is the new gold standard, people.